It's possible that after you're done reading this, you'll have a strong desire to tell me stop whining and drive on. Maybe you'll be right. I dunno.
I'm probably just frustrated amidst my adjusting time, but whatever. I'm a little bit angry. Here I am. What do I do now?? I feel like there's no real meaning to my life outside of Joe. Will a job give me that? I don't think so. A hobby? A dog? All of our crap fully unpacked so that we may feel comforted in all our materialism? Doesn't seem likely either. The horrible corny answer is that it must come from within. I know, I know. But who the hell am I? I'm Joe's wife, Arielle's sister, Dave, Stephanie, and Jan's daughter. I'm a girl who couldn't wait for high school to be over to get the hell away. I'm a girl who wasn't passionate about college or grad school. It was just the next step and a way to get away. I'm a girl who married a great guy and is living life with him, finally.
If I had it to do over again, I'd be a girl who didn't immediately go to college, but instead waited to realize what I really wanted to do. I would have been the girl who majored in biology/pre-vet and went on to be a veterinarian, yet still somehow marrying Joe. Maybe he'd be in the military or maybe he wouldn't. We'd be able to travel and connect with each other and the rest of the world - have some time that belongs to just us and not the Army or a move. Okay, so now this is more of dream land. But still. I guess it's who or how I wish I was and things were. But hey, I'm here. I can be a mother to a lovely dog, and Joe and I can travel one day when he's out of the Army. Right? Don't ask me why we can't travel the way we want to now, or I won't speak to you any more. Instead, ask Joe...
