Balance.

Feelin' alright tonight. I'm laying in my bed. Lu is on her bed next to Joe's side. And Dex is on the couch. (Joe's still gone.) The evening was decent. I came home after a short day at work (was pukey this morning, though not in a prego way - but rather a "that can of soup must have been off" way), snacked, played tetris and then walked the dogs. Two days in a row I've walked both dogs at once. Folks are probably laughing at me, but oh well. I need to exercise, and so do they. Time and help are limited. Dex has been wearing his gentle leader, so he has slowed down and stopped yanking me around, and Lu paces with him. We're getting a rhythm down, but the whole thing still goes to shit if Dex finds a nice place to hike his leg or Lu feels she needs to disobey the careful choreography that I've outlined. I should probably wear a helmet.

Also, I've laid off the sweets a bit. Well, as much as I can. I buy Fiber One bars and have them as my sweet snack after work. However, Joe bought me a Valentine's Day bag of Ghiradelli chocolate caramel squares, BUT I limit myself two TWO max per day. Today I only had one. I should have had a more balanced dinner than pudding, banana, and bread slice with PB, but damn it. It's just me.

Joe will be back day after tomorrow. He has stayed busy since the plane landed. I've been struggling with a few things lately - cyclical things that always come up again and again - not getting enough help around the house when Joe is home and getting even more mad about being completely alone when he is gone. I guess as a chick who grew up taking care of herself in many ways, I am ready to be taken care of, and yet I find myself to still be the caretaker...or everything. I don't see much resolution in the future, but Joe has vowed as he always does to step up to the plate more. I love him, and I know he loves me. He starts strong, but with time all the help tapers off. Sigh. We'll see. In the meantime I'm trying to figure out some fun stuff to GET OUT OF THE HOUSE and go and do together. Too often when we actually have time together, for the aforementioned reasons, I push for us to get stuff done together - clean, run errands, etc. It's not enough. We need to go do something fun. Callaway Gardens, Atlanta, a state park. Something's gotta give before he leaves again for a while.