Stream of Consciousness

I just ate a brownie. And I drank some milk with it. What the hell is up with my font?

Okay. This feels better. But still a little off. I dunno. So I stopped sleeping normally at night. I'd been falling asleep well enough (reading helps) until last night when I tossed and turned for an hour. The biggest deal has been for a week now waking up between 4 and 4:30 a.m. without fail. Last night I even had the pleasure of waking up at 2, and then 4ish, and of course again when Joe's alarm went off soon after at 4:45. Then I didn't go back to sleep until 6. Of course at ten 'til seven some asshat in or surrounding the neighborhood was blasting their bass-heavy music. Bottom line. I don't sleep well anymore. I think that's why I can't currently relax the part of my forehead over my right eye. It may also have something to do with the stress rash I've had on my neck all week. I should probably take a benadryl tonight or something, but Joe isn't here, so I need to be alert. If someone breaks in, I need to be able to wake up enough to shoot them, instead of say the dog. That would be awful.

I did get a new job this week. I hear that's stressful. It's contract social work crap, and while I've done minimal actual case work on it, it's already tanking. They want me to do five hundred things before I basically have any cases to make money off of, and I'm really just over being screwed. That said, I have an interview on Wednesday for a full time job at a hospital five minutes from my house in which I'd be working as a stabilizing effect for severely emotionally disturbed adults in crisis. Bring it on.

A major plus for this week, though, is that Joe is coming to that one wedding with me. The pass is approved and sitting on the back of the couch as I type. Hell yes. AND, everything (more of what I've been stressing about) is working out with staying with friends (all the logistical stuff of being in the wedding and having a date, my husband no less, that isn't). We're even gonna go up a day early to hang out properly. I'm pumped. I get to take Joe. He is coming with me. I am so very happy about this. Of course, the week after he'll leave for a month. But I knew about that one. It's training season, folks, and I'm expecting him to be gone for parts of every month until....until other stuff.

What else? Still haven't really talked to Dad or Jan. I did send a new e-mail. But nothing verbal. I kinda don't know what to say. Probably another source of stress, huh?

Now let's counter that with a good thing. I love my dog. Yesterday we were out in the driveway putting new tags on our cars and had Dexter out with us. I only had to redirect him a couple times to stay in the yard, and he listened each time. (I've chased him through the road and neighbor's yards before.) As we tried like hell to get part of my tag mount off (it was messed up), Dexter came over and just sat next to us, facing away toward the road. After a little bit in the sitting position, he would slowly lay down, still facing the road and other houses, watching. It was like he was guarding us, and I loooove that. He may only be fifty pounds right now, but he makes me feel safer. Him and Clarence, our .45.

I think that's pretty much everything. Oh, another good thing is that my bestest Columbus friend finally came back from visiting her family. She was the first wife I met here; our husbands exchanged our numbers for us as we sat in our respective hotels all day for weeks as we waited for them to be released for permissive TDY to go home and formally move down here. It's truly lucky that we've hit it off as well as we have, and I really couldn't imagine this experience without her.

And so with all the worries that spring up amidst my sleep, I do have a good husband, a good dog, and good friends both near and far. Love love love you guys!